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Saturday, July 9, 2011

Message In A Bottle

My buddy Mike in Tokyo may like this: I have had a few too many this evening. My family is away - and I don't really have a care in the world.

So... what date is dear old Andrew talking about: is it today, July 8, 2011 (when I am typing this up in Toronto) or twenty years ago August 31, 1991 when I was living in Ohtawara-shi (Ohtawara City), Tochigi-ken (Tochigi Prefecture), Japan?

Both actually.

As a result, I'm going to just phone this one in - at least I'm being honest about it.

I'm up at noon - having slept for 13 hours straight. They say you can't really catch up on sleep, but when you do actually get enough sleep (and then some), it feels like the weight of the world is lifted off your shoulders.

Mathew - my buddy from the State of New York (I'm currently in the State of Intoxication or something) - he calls me at 3PM to see if I want to go out tonight. Hell yeah!

To prepare, I go shopping for food and then go and rent some videos. I have to tell you: Matthew and ex-girlfriend Ashley and both rented videos and those sent from home helped me stay reasonably sane here in Japan, as it can be a rather difficult experience to not understand 90 per cent of what is said to you and around you. That's not Japan's fault - I should be trying harder to learn the language, but women, and time spent wondering about women, and time spent wondering what the hell some women are thinking has caused me to derail in my Japanese language studies.

As such, I'm looking to let off a little steam and get toasted tonight (right now).

Matthew comes over at 9PM and we go out to our favourite local Ohtawara hang-out, the 4C, a small little bar that can hold 20 people if they are Japanese, fewer people if there are gaijin (foreigners) involved - which there usually was).

Sitting there drinking, I don't let off steam the way normal people do. Nope. I want to be a writer when I grow-up, so I need to create! Currently (take your pick on the year) I feel down and depressed a bit - probably the melancholy created by the booze. Thinking about women again - but now I'm also missing my mom who flew back to Toronto yesterday.

As such, I come up with an idea for a series for the Tatami Times newsletter I put together for the Tochigi-ken assistant English teachers on the JET (Japan Exchange & Teaching) Programme. I call it: The Beer Bottle Blues.

It will be semi-autobiographical. It boggles my mind... am I really sitting here carrying on conversations with Matthew while I am writing in my head? I do this all the time. I wonder if I seem like I'm not there all the time to people?

At home after 2PM when the 4C closes, I lurch around the apartment  looking for a pen, and write four short chapters of it until 3:30AM. Chapter five I write in the morning while I'm on the toilet. Perhaps one day they will invent a portable writing implement - oh yeah, they did - a pen, pencil and paper! 

Those five short stories were previously published in this blog. But have a read and tell me if people should or shouldn't write when they are inebriated and sad:
Part 1: Beer Drinkers & Hell Raisers
Part 2: One For The Road
Part 3: I Can See For Miles
Part 4: Strange Brew
Part 5: Joy To The World
And, that's all I ever wrote of it. I guess I am still working on it via Japan - It's A Wonderful Rife.
Somewhere with a Flaming Blue Lamborghini,
Andrew Joseph
Today's blog is by The Police: DRUNK&DISORDERLY
PS: A Flaming Blue Lamborghini was the drink of choice whenever I wanted to get blitzed. One would get you drunk. Two will be get really hammered. And three - well, according to New Zealander Mark the bartender - no one has ever had three. I make a mental note of the fact, and when I'm feeling stronger, I'll take that challenge just to see what will happen and what will happen to those around me.
PPS: Here's a recipe for the drink: Flaming Blue Lamborghini
1/2 ounce of Kahlua; 1/2 ounce of Blue Caracao; 1/2 ounce of Galliano; 1/2 ounce of white Sambuca; Cinnamon Cream Layer Kahlua and Galliano in a martini glass. Pour the Sambuca into a shot glass and light it on fire. Pour it flaming into the drink (ooooohhh ahhhhh pretty blue fire yay!) and throw a pinch of cinnamon over it for the crackling fireball effect. Douse the flames with cream and drink. Now... this is just one of several recipes on the Internet. I believe that Mark would use ice and Cream, puree it with the Kaluha and Galliano and then pour it with the Sambuca into a martini glass. Instead of setting the Sambuca on fire, Mark used Spiritus vodka - a Polish vodka that is 95% proof - this was atop the other alcohol in the drink and it was all set on fire. While Mark them poured in the Blue Caracao, I would would be sucking the drink back with a straw - while the drink was still on fire. Many a time I recall searing my throat, but being drunk way to quickly to really give a damn. And no cinnamon was harmed in the making of my drink.
PPS: Tomorrow I go on a picnic hosted by the Ohtawara Asian Rural Institute and don't talk to anyone from there.
PPPS: Hmm... I don't think I actually mailed this blog in today. Two years ago, Matthew e-mailed me with e recipe for the drink... I no longer have that e-mail after my computer crashed. Isn't modern convenience wonderful? Instead, I actually had to plumb the depths of what's left of my alcohol-abused memory and get the ingredients out. I actually can hear Mark telling me how he makes the drink in my head some 20 years later. Good on ya, mate!

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