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Friday, December 21, 2012

We Survived!


This is a message from the Emergency Broadcasting Service know as your humble blogger. If this had been a real emergency, you could all have kissed your ass good-bye.. I mean... why would you be on this website looking for help? Or any website? It would already be too late. An EMF pulse would take out the electronics... aliens would take out the radio stations... and the Gods would come down from their mountainous homes and would shoot all the lawyers and bloggers because we would serve little purpose in a world where there are no stenographers or computer keyboards.

And yet... some bloggers know so much... if you are viewing this, we have survived the end of the Mayan Calendar, and I get to enjoy the remaining 19 days off before I have to go back in to work on January 8, 2013.

I know, I know... lucky bugger... then again... I barely took a day off this past year... certainly zero sick days for the third year in a row.

I get to spend it at home... wondering why I encouraged my seven-year-old son to believe that Santa Claus still exists... the problem with that is I now have to buy him twice the number of presents... one from me... and one from Santa... (his birthday was two weeks ago, as well)... and my son dreams big, and I'll be damned if I'll dash his dreams.

I think I spent so much on my son because I secretly hoped the Mayans were correct and that the end of the world would actually occur on December 21, 2012. Then I wouldn't have to pay off my credit card bills.

It also means I have to go out today and get something for the wife. Nertz.

Cheers. And Happy December 21, 2012... the first day of the rest of your life... if you are a Mayan.

Oh! And... If I was completely wrong and the end of the world did happen... well... at least I won't be around to hear you say "I told you so, Andrew." Come to think of it, you won't be around to say it. Win-win.
Andrew Joseph
That's the Mayan Calendar in the photo above. If it looks to you like an Aztec Calendar, you are correct. The Mayans took their calendar from the Aztecs.

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