Let's look at a 2012 Japanese flick (made available to me by my buddy Vinny) called Dead Sushi (デッド寿司).
Basically, it's about sushi coming to life and attacking people - and not via indigestion or ass burns from too much wasabi.
Thankfully, this is a comedy-horror film, and, would you believe it, it owes its existence to a better known 2010 movie called Piranha 3D... an American movie.
Now before we all go blaming the Americans for helping foster more trashy Japanese flicks, we can blame the Japanese... after all, it was the popularity of the movie Piranha 3D in Japan that gave pause to Dead Sushi director and writer Iguchi Noburu (surname first), who thought - why not.
Why not, indeed? It's kitsch.
I once saw a double bill some 25 years ago featuring Doctor Butcher M.D., and Surf Nazis Must Die.
Piece of crap movies, right? Right. So how come I can't get the trailer for one of the flicks out of my head 25 years later?
"She's big, she's bad, she's Black! She's Leroy's momma, in: Surf Nazis Must Die".
I heard that once, and it is forever in my head. At least I hope I got the words right. Who knows... even a 147 IQ starts to dim when not challenged enough (it's probably why I challenge myself with multiple blogs that I have to research, along with my day job as a writer - hell, I should be finishing an article rather than be doing this!).
You all thought I was kidding about those movies, didn't you? I wouldn't lie to you.
So... where was I? See... an IQ of 146...
Dead Sushi stars such famed actors as: Takeda Rina, Matsuzaki Shigeru and Suga Takamasa - all surnames first.
Here's more of the plot: The daughter of a famous sushi chef leaves home and goes to work at a rural hot spring. Now... I am unsure why, but the workers there and even some of the guest who work for Komatsu Pharmaceuticals, all seem to think she is ripe for teasing and bullying.
Now... here is where I would expect her father to come into the story and invent some sort of killer sushi to take revenge on the people bullying his daughter... but no.
Apparently a Komatsu researcher comes to the inn seeking revenge. On whom and for what, I am not quite sure at this juncture. But there must be just cause, right? How else to explain him creating a serum that turns fish on rice into killer sushi?
Yes... bloodthirsty sushi.
That means our girl Keiko, who has sushi-making training to come to the rescue... along with some other dude who was a former sushi chef to chop up the killer sushi before things get out of hand. Luckily, Keiko also has some bad-ass martial arts training. Hell, so do I... in four different martial arts, but I never seem to get attacked by killer sushi. I guess that's the high price I pay for living in Toronto, not to mention the high price of sushi here, which I won't.
As an aside, on Thursday past, I had eel sushi for lunch, and then my wife decided to surprise me by ordering unagi (eel) on rice for me, with some sushi. I want you to know that I attacked that sushi with a zeal that would have surprised even the most hell-bent sushi craving revenge for my grotesque appetite for destruction.
Anyhow... it all sounds like a stupid movie, right? Well... surprisingly enough, it's not. But it is. It's well-done comedic camp with a hint of vinegar and rice, that will have you wanting more. You always want more sushi. Even when you know it's trying to kill you.
Available in Japanese language from Amazon.com.
Andrew "I'm still hungry' Joseph