Search This Blog & Get A Rife

Thursday, September 6, 2012

A Kiss Is Not Just A Kiss

I'm going to re-present a portion of a story that appeared in ...  and then I'll present my own opinion.

There is all kinds of kissing all over the world, but traditionally, in Japan there has only been two kinds and they are the romantic kissing done by couples or kissing babies. Public displays of affection have always been frowned upon, and still are: a kiss on the lips is serious business.

Not to mention how unnaturally kissing comes to most Japanese. The moment for a romantic kiss on any Japanese drama looks excruciatingly uncomfortable, especially in comparison to the "eat each other up" passion of western dramas. The jidaigeki, or Japanese period dramas, feature absolutely no kissing. With this in mind, SK Planet Japan did a survey on 400 20 to 30-year-old men and women to find out young Japanese people's views on kissing-which is actually pretty interesting considering that kissing has always been an almost taboo subject.
It was found that 60% of the women polled had only kissed up to 5 people, signifying that experience in this arena is on the low side. By asking the question, "Have all your kisses led to a dating relationship?", it was found that 90% of the women questioned said "no". In other words more Japanese women are willing to kiss for no other reason but that they want to. The casual kiss has taken hold in Japan!

First: There ARE all kinds of kissing in the world....

But a 'casual kiss'? Really? That's what you call it?

Let me tell you... women are smart. Smarter than men and definitely smarter than men who are writers.

Casual kiss? That's a light buff on the lips or a sister-kisser on the cheek.

A woman - Japanese or other - can kiss a single time and tell right away whether or not there is a spark.

I'm a good kisser. A pretty damn good kisser, actually. And despite my kissing ability, suave good looks, above-average intelligence, crazy strong legs and ass, and subtle ego not every woman I kiss falls in love with me. 

I've slept with a lot of women, but even I can tell that sometimes it's just sex... and not a relationship that will last longer than it takes for her to make me scrambled eggs and bacon in the morning before she leaves.

I recall one very, very special and (add your own word of endearment here) woman whom I had met a while back. While there was an immediate intellectual attraction, and a physical one... I also have a voice that can melt butter in a snowstorm.... she told me that if we were going to have any sort of a relationship, she had to see if there was a certain spark... via a kiss.

She had told me that right from the get go. She knew what she wanted to feel, and no other senses of sight and mind were going to get in the way of whatever it is she wanted to feel.

She was with someone when we first became acquainted with each other, but seeing where we met - I knew I had a chance to get my licks in, so to speak.  

On our first date... we went to a coffee house in a part of town I had never been to before, where people might not know her, but, of course I saw someone who recognized me and waved hello.

Later, as we walked along the street, she thought I was checking out someone else and full of brashness asked if that was so. To be honest, by that time my eyes were wandering all over this beauty, taking in every single ounce of her.

I'd never been caught checking out a woman, but her honesty in asking a question begot my answering honestly too. Why hide the truth?

We maneuvered around to a more private location away from everyone's prying eyes...  and she made the first move... closing her eyes and moving up on her tippy-toes to stretch her 5'-4" frame to get as close to my face as possible.

Ever the gentleman, I bent my face down to the right to meet hers, as I put a hand up to the side of her face and held it gently as we kissed, tongues flicking, lips pressed  - but not too hard - against each other.

What did I feel? Fireworks exploding in my head. I had never had that before. And while she did not tell me in words what she felt, that look in her eyes, the flush in her cheeks, her breathless gasp as we broke contact... what other guy?

One kiss. That's all it took. One simple, complex, breath-taking kiss.

You better make it count, boys... because sometimes you only get one chance, so you better make it one for the ages.

Maybe it's because I'm a writer. Or because I'm a journalist who pays attention to such things... but that's all bull.

I remember that kiss because it was worth remembering. 

It was worth not forgetting.

So... a woman having a single kiss and not pursuing a relationship from it. 90%? Does that seem so surprising? Maybe the writer of the story didn't give the Japanese women enough credit... maybe it only took one kiss to know that the guy they were kissing wasn't the one for them. 

Maybe they need to kiss me. One for one. 100%. I can screw the average. And do that very well indeed.

Andrew Joseph


  1. If she never used any specific words of her own, I think she'd likely find "fireworks" to be apt.

    Yes, I think that's about right.

    1. Despite your right to remain Anonymous, I respect your right to be correct. Fireworks. wow.