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Saturday, October 27, 2012

Police Charge Man Who Had Genitals Removed For Public Dinner

Well... this is a complete cock-up.

Thinking he had crossed his T's and dotted his i's, Sugiyama Mao (surname first), a Japanese asexual artist has been charged by police for indecent exposure.

Whoopidy-doo, I hear you say... but this is Japan.

Back in March 2011, Sugiyama, 23, had a professional chef cook up his genitals—previously removed and certified disease free by a penis-removing professional... you know the ones who have a shop on every corner beside the bicycle repair shop... anyhow...

He then had a dinner party and charged his guests to eat his balls and wiener.

Sugiyama was doing this for notoriety, to pay his medical bills and to bring the awareness for sexual minorities, x-gender and asexual people like himself... you know... to show that they are not weird and are just like you and me, but willing to cut off their genitals for cash. For realsies.

Anyhow... you can read about that story HERE.

Here's a picture of the meal carved up by the head chef:
Head chef carves up Sugiyama's genitals... what's obscene is the chef isn't wearing gloves. No glove - no love.
  So... Sugiyama - some nine months after the meal... was charged by Tokyo Police for indecent exposure. Yes... indecent exposure... because apparently cannibalism is not against the law in Japan.

As a writer and pundit, I love this country. 

Apparently after exhausting ways to try and punish Sugiyama, Tokyo Police after hundreds of man hours and how-many-10s-of-thousands of dollars, came upon the brilliant idea of harassing the angst-filled, lethargic Sugiyama and the three other people who organ-ized the wiener roast event.

"Mister Sugiyama-san... we are charging you with indecent exposure. Yes... you people were showing a penis and set of tiny unused testicles upon a dinner plate—there for all the world to be exposed to. Have you no shame? Why do you help the stereotype of Japanese people having tiny genitals? This is why we are really pissed at you!"

Okay... none of that was actually said except in my own echo-y head.
 
Apparently in Japan, indecent exposure doesn't necessarily mean flashing your privates at people... it can also come to mean the display of obscene objects. The penalty could be a maximum jail sentence of up to two years and/or fined up to ¥2.5 million (~Cdn/US $31,309.97).

What's stupid about this whole harassment and charging of Sugiyamama and company is that I'm betting no actual person invited to the charity event actually made a complaint to the police... but the Tokyo Police have probably taken it upon themselves to be the guardians of all that is seen and obscene.

And... if the Tokyo Police do have such powers... able to arrest and charge a person without being present at the commission of the so-called crime or have not received a complaint from anyone actually at the event when the genitals were served (and why would anyone there really be offended... they knew what the event was about in advance - why go and be offended?) ... then it all sounds kind of fascist to me.

For shame.

In response to the police arresting and charging Sugiyama, he is reported to have said: "Bite me."

Because Sugiyama has no genitals for the police to bite, Tokyo Police were reportedly at a loss for words.

Cheers
Andrew Joseph
I made those last two sentences up.

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