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Friday, July 21, 2017

You Must Remember This

I’m a Humphrey Bogart fan - but only since my early 20s, because that is when I was in university and trying to be more worldly by watching black and white movies and talking about bourgeois things, because that what supposed middle-class people do instead of being a drunken frat-boy.

Actually, I don't know if that’s true. I certainly could drink… but I was never a frat-boy, so I have no idea what they did or didn’t do. My only frame of reference is Animal House (movie) and its misshapen spawn Delta House (TV). The good thing about Delta House was that it was the first time I fell in love with Michelle Pfeiffer, as I had a thing for blondes back then.

Speaking of blondes, the Japanese movie poster for the Humphrey Bogart movie Casablanca (above) also stars Ingrid Bergman.

While Bergman did not begin my love affair with Swedish women—that may have begun with porn star Seka… who may not have been Swedish, but at the very least did star in numerous Swedish Erotica films.

For the record, I no longer look at a woman based on ethnicity or color of hair, because…  well… despite my juvenile humor here, I’m a grown-up now.

Intelligence is the thing... not necessarily diploma-based, either... intelligence to keep me intrigued. Or sex... sex can also do that. (See? Juvenile.)

Released in 1942, Casablanca is a drama/romance flick set in Casablanca, Morocco… about Bogart’s character Rick Blaine—he owns a nightclub—and learns that an old flame, Ilsa (Bergman) is in Casablanca with her husband. The hubby has Nazi Germans after him. Ilsa, knowing that Bogart’s character is a bit of a slickster, comes to him to help her husband out of a jam.

Yup… that’s the plot. Obviously things start to heat up, proving it is impossible for men to be friends with a woman without him thinking about sex. 

I don't know if that was the typical way of thinking back in 1942, but in the 21st century, I can guarantee you that even if a guy was to help your husband out of a jam, that guy is not doing it because he's a nice guy... he's doing it because he wants you. And, if you are using him because you know he will do anything for you, what does that make you?

This is why I struggle with Bergman's Ilsa character. Is she really so naive to believe that her ex-boyfriend will help her out because:
  1. I really need help for my husband, and because Rick's a nice guy and it's the right thing to do, this should be a no-brainer, or;
  2. I need someone with questionable morals help my husband escape from the Nazis... and that's Rick... and I can play off his lust for me to help ME out, or; 
  3. I am just using this whole thing with my husband as a means to see Rick, because as much as I know he wants me, I want him twice as much. 
Speaking as man—albeit a man with a juvenile sense of humor—I can 100% guarantee you that every heterosexual man thinks that when a woman comes to him for help, Option 3 is the ONLY option—that that he thinks it is what the woman is thinking.

As evil as she wants to be, the Notorious Ingrid Bergman played a nun in 1945's The Bells of St. Mary, and a saint in 1948's Joan of Arc... and used her sexy wiles to get exactly what she wanted in 1942's Casablanca. 
My guess is that if this was a 2017 movie, Option 2 would be the correct answer... but again... I'm unsure exactly what moralistic drama the writer(s) were employing for this 1942 movie. Could Ilsa really believe in Option 1? Sure... but is that naive considering she knows that Rick is conniving? No... because she knows that Rick can help her husband, the implication is that Ilsa knows Option 2 is the ONLY option.
So... is this really a story about romance? Or is this about a woman using her feminine charms to manipulate a greedy man who just wants to lay pipe? And no... nothing is bothering me... I'm just looking at the movie from a different angle. Obtuse may eventually come to mind. That's funny and you know it.

Anyhow… the above poster of the Warner Brothers movie is from 1946 Japan… the movie did not make its debut in Japan for four years after its North American release... not until June 13, 1946—owing to the fact that Japan was partners with those self same Nazi’s who were after Ilsa’s husband (Victor Lazslo played by Paul Henreid) until September of 1945.

You know that for any guy lusting after another man's woman... even though he might actually do his best to help both parties out, he is secretly hoping the Nazi's will win out and kill the competition, knowing that within six months, yeah six months, after playing nursemaid to her grief, yeah, that's the ticket, I can make her mine. Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!

Okay, while no sane guy is going to kill for you, we might, however, accidentally on-purpose choose to look the other way to help create the ultimate fail for him, and win for me. Oh, and that, of course, means a win for you, too, honey.

I didn't say guys were smart. But I am wondering/saying/asking that in this movie... one of the best movies of all-time... who's the real bad guy? Might not be a guy, afterall.        

The B3 poster (sized 15” x 20.5”) is an atypical size of movie poster… with this particular size ONLY appearing at the three theaters in Japan where the movie debuted on June 13, 1946: Musashimo Kan, Houraku Zza, and Denkikan… so three theaters… that’s it… you know this one is rare. Rare as an honest man in Bogart’s Casablanca.

If you are interested in this poster, Heritage Auctions is currently offering it for purchase HERE, with an estimated value of US$2,500-$5,000.

Regardless of what Casablanca’s main song “As Time Goes By” utters, a kiss is NOT just a kiss. If you’ve ever been with someone… and shared some weird connection from something as electric as a single kiss… you know that it can transcend time and space, making the angels weep with jealousy.

I got plenty of time,
Andrew “let me rethink that” Joseph     

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